I thought I feel much better and emotionally more stable but I guess not. I'm just going into another phase or whatever you called.

I felt empty and realise I begin to miss him more. I have been trying my very best telling myself not to think about him even though my mind just wander to him and everything concerning him. I really want to hear his voice again, read his texts again, and see him again. I can't deny these as I know it's a fact.

I feel so wtf and I just don't know who to look for to give me more guidance.  Crying has been a normal situation now and I'm used to it finding myself crying regardless night or day.

Maybe he just magically forget everything and carry on with his life. Or he thinks that its just nothing. Whatever he think, I do want to know how he felt when someone mention my name. Or maybe he just feel nothing. He just appear in my mind anytime, anywhere. And how I wish I can remove it but I can't. Did he even have the urge to text me to know how I have been doing?Did he know what he did can make a girl went heartbroken and moody for months? There are so many questions I would like to ask but no way I can find answers to it. If he text me, how would I feel? I don't know. I find bits and pieces of him in every song, every article. All these bits and pieces tears my heart bit by bit and making me worse.   

The only thing I can assured is my heart is still shattered and is still with him.